All the customers at work today putting together gift packages kinda put me in a downer today.
Because two months from today would've been our 4 year anniversary.
Apparently I'm the only one that still cares 'bout that.
Irritates the fuck out of me too.
That there's still a large part of me that still wants to marry her.

James Blunt- Goodbye My Lover

Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what's mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won't stop there,
I am here for you if you'd only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
I've kissed your lips and held your head.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I've been addicted to you.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.(x2)

I am a dreamer but when I wake,
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be
I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.
I've watched you sleeping for a while.
I'd be the father of your child.
I'd spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We've had our doubts but now we're fine,
And I love you, I swear that's true.
I cannot live without you.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.(x2)

And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I'm asleep.
And I will bear my soul in time,
When I'm kneeling at your feet.

Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.(x2)

I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.(x2)
---------------------------------

James Blunt, added to my personal list of awesomeness defined.
Because if awesomeness isn't a word, it should be.

Why this song as my personal favorite off the album?
Cuz it's what I'm trying to get myself to believe.
What's the point if I'm the only one that wants to put in work?
Why am I still thinking 'bout her on a daily basis if she doesn't even give me the time of day?
Why am I going on myspace every few days to check out her profile and piece together her current life through her comments?

Why?
Such a simple and poignant question.

Kinda like...
Has anyone seen a license plate holder that says: "I'd rather be driving" yet?
Or how 'bout: "I'd rather be sleeping"

Apologies for the emotional rollercoaster on display online the past few months.

On the next post: Fun Ideas for Marriage Proposals from My Personal Mental Inventory
Cuz I won't be needing them.

The Random Quote:
"But it's time to face the truth. I will never be with you." - James Blunt